12 months

One year ago at this time, I was holding a tiny little hour-old (but two-weeks-late) baby in my arms, and today I am the mother of a little princess (complete with a royal good-bye wave – the action is all in your wrist!) You have come so far in such a short time. I miss my little baby, but I love seeing you grow up into who you are meant to be.

This month you started going to daycare, and it’s been a smooth transition for us all (so far – this is still only week two!) My first week back at work was long and tiring for everybody, but you are settling in at Cindy’s house without any fuss, and we are all breathing a sigh of relief over that. You did, however, have your first major injury at Cindy’s house just a couple of days ago – a fall into the corner of a table that left you with a giant purple bruise on your forehead. Luckily this happened a couple of days after your birthday party, and all the photos of you in your little party dress are not marred by the goose egg!

Now that the weather has finally gotten better, we’ve discovered the outdoorswoman in you. All we need to do is say ‘outside’ and you are headed for the door, and you get impatient when we slow you down in the application of coats and shoes! You love to putter around the driveway with the ride-on toys and balls, and you also love to sit by a corner of the garden and pick: pick at the crocus petals, pick at the mulch, pick at the grass… all these cool new things you were too tiny to remember from last year. As a family we have always enjoyed a lot of outdoor pursuits, and it makes me happy to think of how well you fit in.

This month we finally deciphered your first deliberate word, and – be still my heart! – that word is Mom. Just as Liam has always done, you don’t use Mommy or Mama or any diminutive form, so you’re a one year old sounding like a ten year old… but that’s OK. It’s still the most wonderful thing to hear. You have been indiscriminately saying “dadada” for some time now and I wouldn’t be surprised if Dad becomes your second word – followed by Liam as a third. (For the record, Liam thinks your next word will be “Captain”, but you are not nearly as enamoured of the cat as you are your brother – so I beg to differ.)

You continue to assert yourself more with each passing day. Your latest thing is shaking your head no whenever you’re asked a question. “Do you want some milk?” Your head is shaking, even as you’re reaching out for the cup. “Do you want to go outside?” You’re shaking your head even as you run down the hall toward the door. And I still get a kick out of your drama queen displays. Maybe my mind is playing tricks on me, but I could swear you pull these hissy fits more with your dad now than you do with me. Is it wrong that I find that funny?

Your appetite seems to have completely derailed this month. I know this is what’s supposed to happen, that it should be leveling off along with your growth, but it’s disconcerting to see you sometimes thumb your nose at an entire meal. You are also going through an anti-produce phase, rejecting almost all fruits and vegetables and seemingly subsisting on bread and dairy alone. I can sometimes sneak strawberries into you, though you will then refuse to eat them for Cindy, and she can get you to eat bananas, but you won’t touch those at home… it’s maddening. The best luck I have these days is giving you raisins and dried apricots – something about the lack of moisture in the fruit seems to do the trick.

Tomorrow I take you to see Dr. Bailey again, for your 12-month checkup and shots (ugh!) You got 2 new teeth this month that have been causing you a lot of pain, but that’s nothing that some Tylenol and cuddle time with Mom can’t fix. I worry about you when you toddle around (and as your forehead currently shows – I should!) Even though you now have six weeks of walking under your belt, you seem possessed to keep up with Liam in all his running, jumping, climbing preschooler glory – something that your mind may be ready for, but your body is not!

I still can’t believe that I ever thought I would be the only female in a house full of boys. You are the sweetest little thing I have ever known – I could just dip you in syrup and eat you for breakfast. You are the perfect counterpoint to Liam, giving your dad and me the chance to experience the best of both worlds, and you provide Liam with a friendship that I can tell he already treasures. The way you sing in your crib in the mornings, break out in dance whenever music is playing, clap gleefully when you hear the word “Yay!”, jabber to yourself as you putter around the house and sigh as you drowse off to sleep – these things all melt my heart. I think you are the most beautiful little girl I have ever laid eyes on – I have your photograph tacked up on my bulletin board at work, and I often find myself smiling back as I see you looking down on me. I will never be able to find the words to give justice to how much I love you. I hope to see you have children of your own one day, because only then do I think you will really understand.

Love,
Mom